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Hitting the Ring at Plato's Crash Landing

We got another crew together and went to Plato's Crash Landing for a wonderful night of wrestling. It turned out to become one of the best nights of wrestling I ever went to. I was running my comic book store and I talked every one I could think of into going to wrestling that Friday night.

My catch line was,"It's the most fun you can have with your pants on!" And about two hundred wrestling folks filed in that night.

I think I knew about sixty people in the crowd and for most of them it was their first card ever .

If it is your first night at wrestling, you have to really turn it on and the Front Row was primed to really raise the roof. And we did just that. The wrestlers that night were a bunch of locals trying to put on a good show.

And they needed a lot of help because most of them really never should have been in the ring. Personally. I get really tired for seeing a bunch of guys trying to act like wrestlers that weigh about a buck seventy-five. It just doesn't work visually but I will say one thing about this motley crew, they did try. There were three moments that really did stand out that night.

First, there was a match with Bam Bam Coleson verses Cowboy Chris Star. Coleson I knew from way back because he use to buy slurpees from me when I worked at Seven Eleven.

And he weighed in at about three hundred and fifty five pounds and that is being very kind.

The Cowboy looked like he spent time starving in India and all his synapses didnít fire if you get my drift. We spent the whole match yelling at Bam Bam to pull up his pants.

Then Bam Bam went for the running shoulder block in the turnbuckle on to Chris Star. Chris was a lot smarter than we all thought because he moved out of the way.

Bam Bam went right through the ropes, hit the ringside and fell to the floor with an earth-shaking fall. I think that half the audience felt the room shake with that bump. But it wasn't a bump it was a screw up.

Second, there was this guy wrestling who was named the Flash. That is all I really remember about this skinny guy. But he too messed up big time. During the match, Flash tried to walk the top ropes like the Undertaker.

Only one problem, he wasn't the Undertaker. This guy walked about three steps and lost his balance. He fell forward crotching himself on the top rope. I am sure to this day he has never had any children due to this fall.

He then fell out of the ring and began juicing. Hey Dude, losing a nut for my five bucks is really enough thrills for anyone to hope for!

The third big moment was not really planned but it really was something that every one there still talks about. Diamond Dan was wrestling in the main event against some guy who looked like a drunken caveman.

Before the main event, Dan told me he was going to win the match with a Hulk Hogan leg drop and he wanted his brother Bud and I to hit the ring and celebrate his big victory.

That sounded very cool to me.

So I told Bud and I told my buddy Doug and I told Vic and Brian and Obin and Big Eddie and KC. And. well, I told everybody what the finish was and that they needed to hit the ring at the end of the match I really didn't think that they would tell their friends this but they did and I think about half the people there were primed for the big run in.

You could tell something was brewing because when Dan Came out the whole place went nuts cheering him. And sure enough, a miracle happened and Dan won his match with a Hogan Leg drop!

Just as the referee raised Dan's hand in victory, the place went berserk and people began flying into the ring from all sides!

It was really funny to look at the tape and see all these people jumping, siding into the ring cheering for Dan.

There was one thing that I didn't count on and that was this was a weak ring and as soon as all these people got in it got very wobbly and I could barely stand. It was like trying to stand on a moving trampoline.

Needless to say, Dan was shocked but took it the right way and I raised his hand in wrestling glory.

Or something like that.

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The Southern Comfort Boys

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